Conquering Fear

Change of jobs, Change of roles, Change in bosses, Change in organizations, or New Organizations – I’m sure, irrespective of our vintage or age, all of us have had our fair share of fears. However, the enhancers, in these instances, have been opinions, information and perceptions that we have gathered from others and the external world.

My 3 year old son, like any other normal kid, had his fair share of fears too. Fear of darkness. Fear of some specific Relatives. Fear of visiting the Barber’s Shop. These are a few to name. Whilst these might look trivial for us as adults, for him these were genuine fears and instinctive in nature ( not something he could control ).

Recent turn of events made me really sit up. We were planning to go the barber’s shop and decided we would prepare him well in advance. As an add on, we ran through the process what would be followed. As we reached the shop, he kept openly reassuring himself using words that we had used and sat at his seat. While, his face indicated pressure, he would force a smile and check on how long more he would need to sit. That session he conquered without a tear. He battled inside I know as a parent. Yet, he emerged a winner for life, for he learnt a very important lesson of answering his inner fear.

Next step was in answering deep rooted fears like darkness. The highlight is that Darkness, at my age, still instills fear. Yet, being able to logically use wits and not let fear take over was important as a lesson to teach. So, we addressed all family members, individually, in his presence that darkness was nothing and required that you shout out for somebody to switch on the light, and wait for some time. Every body was informed to answer his call with utmost importance. Today, he has reached a stage where he enters a dark room and admonishes people for keeping it dark. Constant re-iteration and implicit faith has helped the 3 year conquer another fear of his.

Perception, looks of some relatives have instilled fear in him. No fault in those people. That is how they are…Yet he could not accept them at par with others in the family. This fear continued till his parents  communicated affection for that relative. He could have continued to hold his opinion. Nay ! That is the power of external influence !! The little mind twitched in dilemma….. Yet the decision he took was a brilliant one…. He chose of his own accord a moment, where he walked across to the person he feared the most, sat on his lap and learnt to smile….. !

These were just contexts where I as a parent observed my little boy teaching me lessons in conquering fear.

We have all had enabling circumstances, and yet how many of us have walked the path of conquering the inner fears. Including me, we become silent prey to our inner fears and tend to sit in our comfort zones. All of us have our own circumstances, reasons, rationale. Yet, the fact remains that an opportunity was lost. We fear repercussions. We have responsibilities.

 Yet, whenever I have interacted with my colleagues, we have all agreed that our progeny or next generation will definitely get the comfort to take that call and we would gladly help in providing the enabling environment.

This Navarathri, let us help another fellow-mate, family member, son, daughter or relative, take that important step that they contemplate / fear. Let us help in removing obstacles that we faced and ensure that they do not have to face the same. Let the power of positivity prevail. Let confidence prevail. Be it Parenting, Team Work, Leadership or Networking – Instilling Trust and Faith should be our method.

Happy Navarathri 2019 !